Till You Come Back To Me Again

After mass this morning, I was talking to someone from the "old neighborhood". He knew I was "one of the Strangis girls" (if I had a nickel for every time I heard that I'd be rich). My grandson was by my side...my daughter and granddaughter off to corral Brian (he has developed a habit of kneeling before Fr. Vince in the vestibule after mass reminiscent the scene of Maria kneeling before Mother Superior in the Sound of Music *sigh*) When comparing families, I introduced Nicholas and told my old friend I had 4 children and 2 grandchildren. Nicholas immediately tugged my arm and said "Nana, you have 3 grandchildren"

Last week, my grandaughter informed me I can no longer call her "angel" like I have since she was born. "Nana, my brother is an angel. I'm not an angel."

These children...so innocent...yet so wise. To Nicholas, who is eight, his brother is real. He existed...he has a name. To Keegan, who is five, her brother still exists, watching over her from heaven. They both speak of Joshua as a cherished brother. A brother they never got to see...yet one they will never forget.

We held a funeral mass for Joshua this past Friday. Family and friends gathered to celebrate the life of a beautiful soul who was born to die. He was loved the instant he came into being...not only by his family, but by God Himself. No less so than if he had been full term...no less so than if he had lived for years.

God tells us he knows us before we are knitted in our mother's womb. That is a powerful thought. We are known to Him, even if others forget us. We matter to God even if it seems we don't matter to anyone else. There is a place for us at His table even if others reject us. We not only exist, but we are exalted even if unseen by others in the womb. It makes no difference if we are 90 years old or 90 seconds old, we ARE SOMEONE to God! A life to be celebrated!

I am ashamed of my answer to my old friend. Never again will I forget the life that lives for all eternity in the arms of our Lord...my precious grandson. I have 3 grandchildren...Nicholas, Keegan, and Joshua. My love for them will never end.

And to my dear daughter and son-in-law...I know your grief has been magnified by the fact that there are some who have been insensitive to your suffering. There have been some who have not recognized that, although brief on this earth, Joshua lived...and he will live forever. I ,too, have been disappointed by some. All I can say is forgive them...they don't understand. And if that is hard to do right now...just remember, there is an angel up in heaven who already has.